AZ-ZAIN... AT LAST

Alhamdulillah, Az-zain finally arrived on our shore....and makes my life easier in a way that I dont have to spend so much time reading all those frosty small prints at the back of frozen food wrappers at the supermarket.


Abang,you can now eat the chicken on our table with peace of mind....I hope it makes you happy.


Eversince he reads about the adverse effects on eating mass produced poultry quite some times ago, he has been reluctant to eat chicken. Questioning almost everytime a chicken dish appears(come to think of it, how come you'd never fire any q's when eating kay eff see?) ,"  Mama, ni ayam kampung ke ayam 'bandar'?"  Since it is not easy for mama to get her hands on ayam kampung, Mama is prone to resort to white lies...the answer would usually sounds like," I bought this at a kampung..."(while thanking God that we are actually living a place called kampung even though it is not actually very kampung ) implying that is some sort of ayam kampung....hehehe...sorry Abang. 
I'm sure by the time you are interested enough to read this blog, you would be able to forgive me,kan! As for the time being, you show no interest at all....unlike Adik who would from time to time check out this blog and never fail to declare that it is BORING. Adik!! you are the one who ask me to start blogging in the first place,show some encouragement la...
(she actually said,she could only understand the conversation parts and it is boring because there is no picture at all. I will post some picture once the know-how comes to me...InsyaAllah,by the time you are big enough to really read and appreciate this blog, you will see some pictures as well.)


Anyway....


Mama and Abah are so keen on Az-zain products that we decided to stock up on them...and what better way to do it othen than become a distributor? So,we went out and bought a deep freezer and stocking up. Mama sent out text messages to a group of selected friends,families and neighbours informing them about our new venture. Turn out that they really are supportive and are actually quite well-informed on halalan toyyiban food. So, Alhamdulillah...so far so good. The profit margin is so tiny that Abah said we have to be in business for 10 years before we got back on what we have invested....it was a joke, really. Profits is not our main concern. To be able to have not only halaal but pure food is. 

Az-zain products contains no artificial growth hormones and haraam materials such as hydrolized protein, bloodmeal and porcinemeal. They are also free from synthetic chemicals and genetically modified organism used to intensify production in the normal farm.


One of the bad effects of regularly feeding on this 'artificially' reared animals is early puberty which then will be followed by a series of social problem...being involved with the shelter homes makes me more aware of this. The age of trainees coming in nowadays is getting younger and younger. We even have a thirteen year old.....that's really makes me shiver. And to think that for one reported/discovered case, there would be tens more like it out there....


So, Abang and Adik, we dont want you to grow up faster than you should.....
(i would lose my two staunch admirers who think I'm the most beautiful girl in the world,the best cook ,the best storyteller and the best of everything...you would realise that it is not true once you grow up and out of my wings,huhuhu.....)


p/s
1. thanks to Cik Jah for forwarding the mail informing the arrival of azzain to KB. Nanti balik kelate,maghi la dumoh, kito blanjo make burger yg fat free,msg free and 90% meat.

2. to Adik...i've finally figure out how to add pictures....we start with a photo of Grey and others will come along, tungguuuu!!

REMINISCENCE

Seven of the trainees that I interviewed last year 'graduated' from the Shelter Homes in this month of July. I saw them left with tears of joys and with hope that they will have the strength to face the world again. To be able to put into practice of what they have learned here and to be steadfast in their amals. But the main concern is for them to have the support from their closed ones. I admit that I'm so worried about them......after a year, they have become like my own children/sisters. I love them all and I know they love me back.

They 'graduated' with flying colours. Some of them came in not knowing a single alphabet of the Holy Book, never heard of the word Dhuha, Tahajjud is so alien and none of them has been doing the obligatory prayers regularly. Yet,when they walked out of this House,all of them khatamed the Qur'an at least twice. One left me speechless with astounding 12x khatam, that's once every month....and she was the one who, during interview, thought nobody prays regularly just because her parents do not. Alhamdulillah, all of them have such a high spirit to go back to their family to do da'awah amongst their parents and siblings.

When they first came in, all of them had this mindset that they were being punished and have this gloomy looks about them. It is very uplifting to know that they now felt they were lucky to be chosen to spend a year at this House. It was a sign that Allah still loves them, guides them to taubah and then learn how to be an appropriate servant of Him.

They have changed my perspective. I'm sure you still remember Adik...we always looked at them with disgust, those mat/minah rempits, who surrounded our cars when we stopped at traffic lights on our way back home from our swimming sessions. The session finished at 7pm and we were always rushing home so that we wont be late for Maghrib. ( Abah is all for us to go swimming on condition that we must be home before Maghrib azan) As we were going home, they were coming out.....and I used to tell you that they came out with syaitaan as those wretched creatures do come out at dusk. We looked at them as if they were absolute rubbish. I even sometimes prohibited you from looking at them....

It all changed when I started working with them. After I know their stories,their sufferings,their anguish......they are all the victims. Of what,you may ask.....I learned not to point fingers at their parents, friends or school or whatever I assumed before. I honestly learned and believed the fault lies on all of us, the ummat who has abandoned the work of Da'awah. I found the finger actually pointing at me!!

Nowadays I see them, those problematic teenagers, with different eyes, the ones with sympathy, empathy and guilt, especially guilt because I couldnt reach out to them. Those girls  think the guys really care about them, love them and make them happy,in short,what they crave in their teenage years. It is always too late when they finally realised that the guys are really just after one thing. So, they end up at the House, some being pregnant and some are not, but broken nevertheless. All of them come from unhappy family where they do not 'talk' to their respective mothers. All mothers who came in during the interview told us the same old story. Their girls are so quiet at home, never confide in them,thus seemingly have no problem whatsoever, and they just couldnt believe it happen to their girls......

I would come home and hug you Adik, and make you promise that you will always treat me as your best friend to whom you could tell absolutely everything....and you did promise, so, ingat ye!!

I now teach you , Abang and Adik, not to look at them teenagers, with hostile look anymore. They are to be pitied, they dont have the opportunity to experience good childhood where the parents really obey the commandments of Allah according to the sunnah of our beloved prophet. Let us start in our own home. Let us create the environment of Iman and Amal in our home,then our village, our country and in the whole world. Let us all be the dai'e of Allah. 

Please Allah, choose us, despite all our shortcomings and sinfulselves.(ada ker perkataan ni?).

I now ask you to pray for them, pray for Hidayah.....InsyaAllah, if we sincerely pray for them while asking forgiveness from Allah for our  own weaknesses, they will, one day, find the lights....

TIME TO CHANGE....

That's what Abang said few days ago...(I think you got it from one telco advert.) And it made all of us smile. Abang, the one who rarely make a statement or say big words.....

What's going to change now Abang? I admit that I'm a bit apprehensive....

From Mama's observation, you have began to be more adventurous in your eating habit. Infact, those words were uttered during a meal when you decided to try out new dish. 

Eversince you started eating, you have been a picky eater. Not difficult or fussy, just picky. You went through a phase of 'white food' only where you would only eat food that has no colour or just white, like clear soup, rice , egg minus yolk etc.

Then, came a phase of peanut butter and jelly sandwich or PB & J sandwich as you called it. This had to travel with us wherever we go...Even when we stayed in a hotel with a buffet spread fit for a king, you would still insist on your PB &J sandwiches.( many of our relatives would remember this as those jars would always appear whenever we dropped by at their place) 

 As you grow older, it gets easier but you are still very predictable in your eating habit. When we eat out, it will always be roti canai telur for breakfast and if it is dinner, fish and chips or nasi goreng. And the drinks, it always iced milo. We dont even have to ask you, but Abah, in his constant effort to lure you into trying new dishes, would always let you read the menu and ask you to order despite knowing ....

As for Adik, hemmm....she will scan the menu up and down and order the one with the strangest name. In our recent trip, while Abang stick to his iced milo, Adik would order es gaul and soda gembira....and gobbled up otak sapi  and the likes!!

(Mama went bonkers over es alpukat read avocado and Abah over jus sirsak read soursop)

Lately Abang has been eating a lot....he would eat the most rice/bread/pasta compared to all of us, even more than Abah. And grows taller and 'fuller' at a speed....

Last month, we had to bring you to the tailor again for your school pants as the ones made in December last year dah senteng....

You are still not eating seafood save fish. While the three of us would enjoy prawns ( esp Adik) and squids or cockles, you would blissfully eat your rice or bread with serunding daging. Thank God for those serunding.....

Come to think of it, I think you do have a healthy eating habit. You eat a lot of carbohydrate which is good for a boy your age and you dont like food high in fat and sugar (except chips and akok). And we should stop asking you to try those seafoods we like so much as they are not exactly a healthy choice, are they?.

I think I should just let you eat whatever you like. Oh, more veges please, and fruits too....As for veges, I'm ever so grateful that both of you, Abang and Adik, seems to like sayur kampung more,the likes of okra, long beans, brinjals and petola which I could easily get at the farmers market, organically grown. Abah himself is growing some okra in our backyard now and some kacang botol are at productive stage, growing wildly on the chain- link fence also in our backyard. Not mentioning many ulams that Mama grows....

Fruitwise, I' m not worry at all for Adik, but I think Abang does not eat enough fruit because you cant be bothered to peel them, betul tak Bang? Kalau Mama suap, banyak je makan....You eat bananas if I cut it up and sprinkle on your morning cereal, but wouldnt eat them on their own. Your favourite fruit at the moment is red dragon fruit.

All in all, you are doing fine as far as eating is concern. And as a charmer,you are very good at ambil hati Mama. According to you, whatever Mama cooks always taste better and Mama makes the meanest lasagne in the whole wide world...but, when it comes to fish curry, it seems that Tok Su's is still better than mine!

Other changes that I would like to see....

*Spend less time in the bathroom

*Play less....

*And this is important; please,please...no more buat pe'el as you always do upon waking up from sleep during a journey,be it short or long...esp when we are actually arriving not at our home!! Enough of it la Abang, you are so big now....buat malu jer!

*More responsible in carrying your inhaler and nasal medications wherever you go,just in case.....

And actually, banyak lagi, but Mama dah penat ni and Makcik Zila is here to clean the house, so I"ll just stop here.

Oh,just one more thing, I notice that you are more 'vocal' in expressing your thought nowadays....few days ago,walking away from me, you said,"Mama,you have a short fuse and fond of berleter"....!!! OUUUCH....this is one of the things i hate when you change......

HOME SWEET HOME

Surabaya from our 18th floor hotel room

 

There's no place like home,honestly!!
It"s soooooo GOOD to be home!! 
That's what all four of us agreed upon. Even after staying in not one but two five star hotels in a span of five days with all the comforts and luxury, the smell and sight of this home is more pleasing to us . 
Mama fell down straight away on much missed bed, Abah went to check up on his beloved orchard while Abang and Adik fussed over Grey and her litters. How we miss all of these......Grey was so excited to see us and cannot wait to get into the house after having to stay away for 6 days.

Our trip to Surabaya was good, Alhamdulillah. Even the delay of the flight home was good. We missed our flight to KB due to it but we got to go to Mak's house because of it. See, if anything befalls us and we accept it with redha and say Alhamdulillah 'ala kullihal...good things are bound to happen despite the misfortune.

Mak Su Pah and family were there as well and in the morning Cik Ni came to breakfast with her troops. Not forgetting Kak Aishah...it was like raya at Mak's house. Its good that we could meet Mak and family as they are not going to balik kampung for coming school holidays, not even for Abang Long Anas's wedding.

Abang and Adik are a few shades darker, no thanks to hours of enjoying splashes in swimming pools. The pool at Shangri La was more enjoyable than the one at Marriott, with its water slides and deeper pool. Even Mama got to swim as well as we practically had the pool to ourselves despite school holidays in Indonesia. (lalala...mama got to try out her burqini...very practical and so sopan one!! definitely recommended!! ) 

Adik, being a museum addict, were so happy that a visit to one of so many museums were included in the itinerary and Abang made everyone wondered how he could finished FIVE helpings of Nasi Padang! It was our ' one million meals'....(million rupiah that is....for 30 of us)

You missed 3 schooldays....must catch up on homeworks.

I hope all these trips and travels overseas since you were 3 and 5 will benefit you, broaden your horizon. I hope it made you see how vast the universe that Allah has created when we come across different faces, different languages but yet when you (esp. Abang) go to the mosques you see people come together to pray to the same God. I also hope you could appreciate the life that Allah has granted us, be thankful all the times. 

Most importantly, I hope you do observe the routine that Abah has set every time we were to start a journey. Abah will print out the prayer time of the place we are going, checking out the nearest mosque to the hotel we are staying, making sure every one has a change of clean clothing in the hand-carried bag for prayers in case the one on us are soiled. It should make you realise how important our daily prayers are. To know the exact prayer time is so very important . Unlike our home where we can just rely on azan from every corner of our kampung, in a non muslim country you will have no idea of the prayer time if you come unprepared. It gets more complicated in 4 seasons country esp during winter and summer .......

Anyway, congratulation to both of you for not missing any solat in our recent journey, not even the 4 am fajar solat. Abang even went to the mosque a few times.

You see, by traveling, we get to practise our knowledge and get rewarded by Allah in doing so. I know just how much you two enjoy doing the jamak/qasar...... you learnt from Abah how to look for the kiblat direction on the compass and you got to pray on the plane on our way back from Mecca last time, remember? Not forgetting the masnun do'as that we get to recite on many occasions......

All in all, I hope it will deeply instilled in you the importance of guarding our solat, doing it on time,( in a congregation for men) and not just doing it....

BUT, as for now, I dont think I want to go anywhere faraway from home anytime soon...... I loooove being home!!( But Abah still has to go to Bangkok next week.....)

OUR BELOVED GREY

Adik keeps on asking me to blog about Grey,so here goes.......

She came to our place about two years ago. She was so fierce and oh so filthy with infection on one the ears. Despite all that, we could see that she is a beauty. Abang and Adik fell in love with her straight away....but she wouldnt let anybody touched her. So, you two fed her fresh milk under the garden table for one whole week. Then, slowly you lured her into our house and the rest is history....

The name came from Mama as at that time Mama was so into Grey's Anatomy and thought she has the same sad, green eyes as Meredith Grey. Later on mama realised that they do share same other traits as well (where opposite gender are concern......)

Mama and Abah were not exactly the cat-loving persons but Grey 'grows' on us. On most nights, we could hear Abah,as the last person to sleep in the house, lovingly cajoled Grey to go out through the window . He would talk to Grey as he would us. Something like," gi tidur kat luar sayang, esok Abah nak gi masjid, boleh masuk lagi..." . I myself never imagine that I could love a cat this much. But Grey is really a special cat. (I'm sure other cat owners feel the same towards their own cats!) Every morning, soon as Abah opens the door to go the mosque for Fajr solat, she would jump in and make a beeline to mama's room. Jump on the bed, kiss mama all over while meowing "maaaw,maaaw.....endlessly until mama wakes up. ( it really sounds like she's calling me Mama!) And if she found Mama already on the prayer mat, she will quietly sit besides me and kiss my head whenever I make prostration. After that, a hectic running to Abang and Adik's room waking and urging them to fill up her bowl in the kitchen. Post breakfast, a drink in the fish bowl as she wouldnt drink from any other water sources. While at it, she always do it very gently, making sure all the small fish in the bowl swim away to the bottom before she starts lapping up the water. Then, she will lazily stretch her full length and 'park' herself somewhere near Abang's room. from then on, she will make no fuss. We hardly hear her most of the times, not even when she's hungry. She will just follow us to the kitchen and look at us with her sad eyes which just melt your heart and make you feed her no matter how lazy you are and how fat she is!! She is a quiet cat. Except from her morning routine, we could hardly hear her if not for the bell on her neckcollar. And, every night, around 9, you will find her lounging on the carpet in our family area where we held our nightly ta'alim....that's really make her a part of our family as everyone in the family would be there for it.

Next week she has another appointment with the vet. I dread this.....this is the second attempt at spaying her. The first one was aborted as she was already carrying litters in her tummy when the vet cut her open. It was a heart wrenching occasion for all of us....seeing her waking up from induced sleep, walked like a drunken and oh, those stitches...they were awful. Mama's the only one she allowed to rub medication on it. And it was all for nothing. If only the animals hospital has a scanner......

We decide to neuter her because she has been giving birth too often which resulted in her being dehydrated and has a deficiency of calcium and other vitamins. The vet had to give 3 injections the other day. It was quite a mystery to us on how she could get a mate as she is one fierce cat. Many a time we saw her chasing cats out of our compound and it was always hilarious. She is FAT and always move very slowly and gracefully ( Abang and Adik truly believe that she is a royal cat! An aristocat....influenced by Disney!) but she abandons it all when she's chasing other cats. It look so funny with her big belly and even bigger tail. And it gets funnier if she starts to berleter as well.Not unlike Mama Abah said............But then, we know that she had a boyfriend, Eric, Uncle Nik's tomcat....the only one she allows in. The mystery is Eric is so old and hasnt been visiting for a long time and Grey very rarely goes out of our compound.

Anyway...that's for her to know and for us never to find out.

I'm dreading the day I have to collect her from the vet after the operation.....Abang and Adik will be no help here. You cant even look at the stitches , let alone cleaning and caring for them. And as usual, Grey will only let me near her when she's in pain.... Do you still remember when you tried feeding her antibiotics? She will try to scratch you but she'll never do that to mama....instead she'll hide her face in the crook of my arms....so funny and so cute kan!!

Grey, we all love you so much!!

WE DID IT AGAIN!

Having successfully executed the task of traveling alone with you kids once, Abah trusted me to repeat the process...... this time around it was a breeze and we found abah lounging at the sentral station instead of hovering like the last time.

It was nothing to other people I guess, but, to me , it was an achievement! 

Those who knew me, know very well how 'incapable' I am, with all blames should go to Abah who has been pampering and spoiling me for so long.....you know how he would draw  maps for me if I have to go somewhere by myself, charting the easiest way,the ones that I dont have to cross the road, the one with least traffic etc etc. And call me  afew times during that!! ( this is pre-GPS era of course!!...)

And all these places are right here in Kota Bharu where I've been living for more than half of my life! And surely you know that I cannot cross the road without hanging on someone's arm....I'm sorry you have such a 'lembik' mother. Abang understands this very well. BUT..... looks like I'm improving, am I not?? hehehe......

Anyway,so there we were in KL for the weekends. And it was a good one. We got to visit Tok Su who broke her wrist trying to pick up rambutans for Kak Chik Illa. Despite still being in cast, Tok Su still manage to fetch us from Shang-ri La hotel and cooked her much- loved fish curry for you Abang! And Kak Chik drove me to Taman Tun to see Kak Shara's son, the adorable Rayyan. And...I got to visit Munawwarah and got something for me....fair lah kan, you got some stuff from Isetan @ KLCC. We even got something for Grey, brewer's yeast for better and shinier coat, but sadly, she refused to take it when we tried giving her this morning. She missed us so much I think and is acting up to show her dissatisfaction of being left at home.

(update: talked to cat expert aka Kak chik and got a tip of how to give the tablets to grey. Her Tom just took it without fuss!)

And today, you two will start your mid year exam......dont know how you will fare, with no study at all during the weekend....hopefully you'll be okay, especially adik now that you have mastered (almost) the multiplication tables. You did badly in math during April test due to the failure to memorize the sifir. Hopefully you'll do better this time around. And I must remind myself not to feel upset if the result is not as I expect.....(must remember pesan Abah.)

As for Abang, I must say that I'm happy with your improvement especially in Bahasa Melayu. Your karangan used to make us laugh so hard, with your rojak bahasa and mixture of written and spoken bahasa. Remember the ' Tulis surat kepada ibu anda......' and you went, Bonda, apa khabar? Anakanda sihat . Bonda tentu boring kat rumah sebab Abang takde, bla bla blaa...." Off course your teacher had to fail you on that!

I told Abah that I could liken you two to the story of the rabbit and the tortoise. Adik, you are the rabbit. You started very fast and full of energy, then you started to slow down and almost sleep! Abang was slow yet he never stop....and look at him today. He got all A's save for Kemahiran Hidup in last test. And he's still improving. He almost never complain of the amount of work I give as both of you,unlike your classmates, do not attend any tuition classes. 

As for you Adik, susah sikit tarik muka and go to your room and sleep it off!! You are so clever adik, everybody who knows you could so testify to it, but look at your last test result....in year 1 and 2, you could pull it off effortlessly, but you must realise the fact that the lessons got harder and you must work likewise. You expect everything to be easy....that's not the way of this life Adik.

Be a good muslim and you'll get that kind of free and easy life in the Hereafter, okay!

SORRY........

Abang and Adik....

Sometimes I think I am too harsh on you two......

I"m so sorry...I really am. Lately, it seems that I got more easily upset more often. I guess separation from Abah does contribute to all these short fuses. I"m so upset now that I upset with you this morning. It doesnt make sense, does it? Anyway, that's how I'm feeling as I'm rambling now.....

I even made Abah felt guilty for these (for being away in Ipoh)....I'm just a bad mother, bad wife. I know you are just being you, an 11 and 9 y.o. To you, everything is a game. You play while you take your shower, you play with your breakfast thingy, you play with each other while brushing teeth thus spraying white bubbles everywhere, you even play while reciting the holy qur'an.....It just got on my nerve today!

Adik, you never switch the lights and the hot water off no matter how many times I remind you. You never pick your pyjamas up, it was always left in front of the toilet's door. Abang takes forever to undress, shower, made ablution and pray....I 've finished reciting Yaasin and he hasnt come out from the toilet yet despite waking up before azan. 

Waking up is another nuisance. Both of you set alarm,5.30am.... so while I was trying to offer my very last minute tahajjud, both of your alarm will set off, ting tong ting tong ting tong......but you never wake up. I've to cut short my prayer and put it off and wake you up 'manually'.

Every night,I make sure the latest you would be in bed is 9.30, depends on Isya' time. After our taalim session, it straight up to the bed, no dilly dallying. Dinner always before Maghrib, milk and cookies after quran recitation after maghrib, brush teeth, wee-wee and Isya'. Then off you are to the la la land...You have got enough sleep!

Aaaaaanyway.......

I have to start thinking of the good things about you kids, before it gets to me. Aha, I suddenly realised what was the trigger factor of all this upset feeling....your monthly test result!! I was taking a look at them after you two went to bed last night. Must speak to Abah now!!!

************************************************

Spoken to Abah, and the off to my lunch date with Kak Jae and Ina dearest....and I'm cured!!

Abah told me not to be upset over things which are not more valuable than half of a mosquito's wing in the eyes of Allah...

I should be grateful that I have a son who at the age of 11 has memorized so many surahs. Amongst them,as sajdah, al mulk, ad dukhan, al waqi'ah,al qiamah and many more(not counting the short surahs in juz Amma). Infact more than I myself could memorize.....I think you have memorized up to 12 surahs so far. And I must admit I do benefit from it as well. As a result of doing the tasme' for you I have succeeded in memorising some of the surahs as well. Plus, when we travel and no quran is available, we could still read the surahs that we recite daily, thanks to you.

And I should be proud that you love to go to the mosque, trying hard to catch up all the five times of solat at the mosque. All these are more meaningful than those academic marks...and as a matter of fact, those marks are not that bad either.....it just that, mama is so kiasu!!

As for you Adik, for a 9 y.o, you have done a good job making up your bed and tidying up your room. You put on the bedcover so nicely and arrange the pillows and your soft toys so neatly. And you always make me laugh with your antics....and to be truthful, I shouldnt be upset at all with your result. It was over 90% afterall...it just that I know you could do better. And, more importantly, you have memorized Surah Yaasin as well as al Mulk and as Sajdah...since last year, a feat that only came to me in my thirties......

My girls day out with kak Jae and Ina(soon to deliver her last child) also helped a lot......thanks a lot guys.... We should do it again.

So, my darlings....I'm sorry I lost my temper this morning.